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Coping Tools for Pain

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There are many different tools to help you manage your pain and can help you to feel more engaged in your life. These tools can also help reduce your pain over time. It’s important to try using a variety of tools, as each can help a different aspect of your life and your pain. Revisit The Navigating Cancer Pain video to learn how.

 

You will probably use some of tools more than others. Most of these tools aren’t meant to be done all the time. Specific tools may be more helpful and feasible on some days more than others.

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How can coping tools be used?

 

Using some tools all the time can actually limit your function while keeping you from other things you enjoy, and, in the end, be unhelpful for your pain experience.

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For example:

Distraction by watching TV may be helpful when you have free time at home, but sitting and watching too much TV can (1) limit you from connecting with others and (2) limit your movement. Both of these things can contribute to worse pain. Watching TV for short-periods of time is a good balance.

Your coping skills are an important part of your toolkit, and are particularly helpful when trying to manage stressful situations.

Some of these coping tools provide more immediate relief than others. Some are helpful in the short term, and for some we don’t feel the benefit until much later.

Let's review some Healthy and Problematic Coping Strategies!

Healthy coping strategies

 

Healthy coping strategies usually include things you can do in the moment to solve a problem or change how you feel.

 

There are many different aspects of the cancer experience, some that you can control and some you just can’t.

It’s important to engage with the things you can control, and to find a way to cope with the emotions that come up when there are things you can't control.

Some of these coping strategies may be as simple as engaging in an activity that brings you joy. Others may be more problem-based and target a specific problem you are having. 

Some examples of healthy problem-based coping skills are:

  • Ask others for help/support

  • Ask for support from a friend or professional/care team

  • Engage in problem-solving

  • Ask others to help with tangible tasks like groceries or laundry when you can

  • Let others know when you realistically cannot do something they ask for

  • Plan and try to come up with a strategy about what to do, what steps to take

Some examples of activities you can engage in are:    

                              

  • Go for a walk, exercise, do yoga 

  • Meditate (click the link!) 

  • Practice breathing exercises (click the link for an exercise!)

  • Spend time in nature, look at landscape photos that help you feel relaxed

  • Look at pictures to remind you of the people, places, and things that bring joy

  • Write in a journal, list the things you feel grateful for

  • Think of something funny, smile, humor and laughter

  • Reframe your thoughts (click the link to learn how!)

  • Play with a pet, draw or color, listen to music, picture your “happy place”​​

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  • ​Cook a meal, clean the house, drink tea, spend time in the garden

  • Praying or trying to find comfort in religion or spiritual beliefs

  • Call a friend or family member to get comfort and understanding from others

  • Acceptance of the reality of the fact that this has happened, remind yourself that you have dealt with difficulties in the past and can cope with this too

  • Find self-compassion

  • Self-distraction by turning to work or other activities to take your mind off things

    • Remember using distraction too much can separate you from what’s important

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Problematic Coping Strategies

 

Problematic Coping Strategies are sometimes helpful in the short term but can also cause problems in the long-term, or when you use them too often. 

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​Here are some examples of problematic coping strategies:

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  • Denial (telling oneself “this isn’t real,” refusing to believe that it has happened) 

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  • Drinking alcohol or using drugs to make oneself feel better in the moment but can cause problems with recurrent or daily/ problematic use, especially when you’re using opioids for pain.

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  • Avoiding activities and coping strategies that have the potential to help one’s pain experience (giving up trying to deal with it / giving up on the attempt to cope)

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  • Resting too much: Resting is absolutely necessary and helpful, yet resting too much can lead to lower function, weakness, and more pain. See the activity pacing text! Staying engaged in activities that are meaningful to you like making coffee, short walks, showering can make a big difference in how you feel! ​

    • Make sure to talk to your doctor before beginning activities.

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  • Self-blame (criticizing oneself, blaming oneself for things that happened)

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Finding a good balance between tools that help you spend time with others, manage your own feelings and experiences, and do enjoyable activities is an important part of good pain management and quality of life. Social activities can help you feel connected with others. Personal coping skills can help you feel at ease, resilient, and calm. As a result, your pain, sleep, and mood may all improve. Activities can help you feel joy, engaged, and balanced, they may even give you a sense of mastery in your life.

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More ideas for coping tools

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Below we have provided a general list of coping skills. You may not be able to do everything on the list below and that’s okay. Please use our list as a starting point of example coping skills.

Activities for Coping

  • Arts and crafts

  • Crossword puzzle

  • Clean your home or environment

  • Drawing

  • Dancing

  • Distract yourself

  • Drink tea

  • Eat your favorite meal

  • Exercise

  • Fishing

  • Games

  • Go outside

  • Garden

  • Gym

  • House work

  • Imagination

  • Journal

  • Knitting

  • Laugh/comedies

  • Long walk

  • Lay down

  • Massage

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  • Meditate - see this exercise!

  • Movie

  • Music

  • Play and instrument

  • Party

  • Play with pet

  • Poetry

  • Puzzle

  • Read

  • Reframe thoughts 

  • Ride bike

  • Shower

  • Sing

  • Sit outside or by a fire

  • Stretch

  • Swimming

  • Television

  • Make a To-Do List

  • Walk outside

  • Write a letter

  • Watch the sunset

  • Yoga

  • Zumba

Social Coping Tools

  • Ask others for help/support

  • Address the real feeling with others

  • Avoid people or places that trigger negative feelings

  • Buddy system

  • Call a friend

  • Dinner party

  • Discuss feelings

  • Get help from others

  • Hang out with others

  • Ignore others who are unkind

  • Help someone else with a program

  • Interact with others/friends

  • Hugs

  • Listen and discuss

  • Speak up

  • Talk to a friend

Personal Coping Tools

  • Be in the moment

  • Breathe

  • Read a book

  • Check in with yourself

  • Identify how you feel

  • Calming techniques – aromatherapy

  • Name something positive

  • Meditate

  • Listen to relaxing music

  • Pray/spirituality

  • Quiet time

  • Relax

  • Rest

  • Vent feelings

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© Desiree R. Azizoddin, Board of Regents of University of Oklahoma, 2022.

© 2022 Dana-Farber Cancer Institute, Inc. (Dana-Farber). All rights reserved.

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